Posted in Picture, Writing

eBay Porn

This evening, while perusing the internet for pictures of jackets for my bi-annual jacket collage, I found this.

A sheep died for this:

So that's where all the curtains from the 80's photo booths went.

At first, I found it all quite offensive to my eye-holes. Why would ANYONE buy something that has been in direct contact with an old ladies ass-shaped titties? She’s not wearing much on her bottom half either, so the inside of that jacket will be absolutely covered in minge-juice.  But then, in the name of research, I decided to give her eBay shop a little visit…..

….and I’ve changed my mind.  This woman is a fucking LEGEND!!

Have a look at her display of wares:

And on the discount rack with a massive 50% off:

Her clothes may look like they were recovered from a Nazi brothel circa 1992 but she also sells stand-alone gas heaters, bread bins, Tureen china vegetable dishes (I don’t know what that is) and shock-absorbing in-soles, so there really is something for everyone.

For sheer balls alone, this woman deserves to make money from her wonderful eBay porn.

Me? I’m gonna buy this, I think it will go great with my orcish helm:

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Posted in Picture, Writing

What the Hell is Wrong With You? #1

Since starting this blog caper, I have taken a keen interest in the search terms people use to find my site, and the longer this goes on, the more depraved these terms are getting. I have decided that it would be wrong not to share them so I will be starting up a new regular* (*when I can be hooped) feature detailing just what sick fuckers you lot actually are.

What better way to start than with some drunk mum fucking and bad cock injuries…

Posted in Video

Brush Strokes & Ball Hair: An Octet of Aesthetic Atrocities

If you’re anything like me, you will dislike visiting a site only to be told to click on a link which will open up yet another page in your browser.  It is just unnecessary hassle.  In saying this, however, please make an exception in this case, as myself and the phenomenal Christian Porter have joined forces to create an article for the magnificent www.gamecola.net.  It discusses the rise of the latest app craze, DrawSomething….that’s a total lie, there is no discussion, it is just a collection of child-like and offensive drawings of genitals, murder-rape and swear words.  There is also a photograph of me with a moustache and a baguette if you’re into that sort of thing. Which I know you are.

http://gamecola.net/2012/04/nsfw-brush-strokes-ball-hair-an-octet-of-aesthetic-atrocities/

This one didn’t make it into the article but it is by far my favourite DrawSomething creation to date so I stole it.

“Election” by Christian Porter

Thank you, love you, bye.